COUPLES THERAPY

In today’s world, relationships come in all shapes and sizes. Embracing this diversity, I strive to create a safe, affirming, and supportive space for all my clients. I am comfortable walking alongside you amid complicated, high-conflict situations, and I work with you and your family to ensure everyone in the therapy room feels seen, cared for, supported, and validated. I offer sex-positive, culturally-attuned, and affirming counseling services for couples, polycules, and relationship structures that are typically underserved and often stigmatized.

AN EMOTIONALLY-FOCUSED & ATTACHMENT-CENTERED LENS

A primary goal when working with partnerships is to develop more secure and resilient emotional bonds with each other. Additionally, we focus on emotions as the primary drivers of behavior and communication in relationships. Therefore, we spend time in therapy learning to identify and express feelings, understand triggers and patterns, and learn how to regulate emotions within the context of the relationship.

I bring a strong attachment theory lens into the room, helping clients reflect on the early and formative relationships they've experienced, which in turn, inform their personal attachment styles. Understanding how these styles influence current relationship dynamics and functions, we collaborate on strategies for tending to ruptures and facilitating repair.

THE IMPACT OF INFIDELITY ON RELATIONSHIPS

Infidelity can be devastating to a relationship, not just because of the breach of trust, but because of the deep, often unseen emotional wounds it creates. As humans, we are wired for attachment, and when one partner engages in infidelity, it can feel like an emotional betrayal that cuts to the very core of the connection. This breach can activate a flood of emotions—hurt, anger, confusion, shame—alongside an overwhelming sense of disconnection and loss.

From an attachment perspective, infidelity can disrupt the internal beliefs that both partners have about each other and their relationship. The partner who committed the betrayal may struggle with guilt and shame, inhibiting their ability to show empathy or take responsibility meaningfully. This lack of empathy can further erode the sense of safety and connection within the relationship.

For the partner who has been betrayed, infidelity often triggers attachment injuries—experiences of deep emotional pain that affect how they relate to others going forward. The emotional fallout can lead to mistrust, difficulty with vulnerability, and an ongoing fear of abandonment. It can also challenge their sense of self-worth, as they may wonder why they weren’t enough for their partner or why their needs were neglected.

Rebuilding trust after infidelity requires a commitment to repair, both individually and the relationships. For couples committed to healing, this process often involves strengthening the relationship’s foundation—deepening communication, creating shared meaning, and learning new ways to support each other emotionally. Couples can find new ways to reinforce their bond and create an even stronger connection moving forward, but this requires vulnerability, empathy, and a willingness to do the hard work necessary for true repair.

THE IMPACT OF TRAUMA AND COMPLEX PTSD (C-PTSD) ON RELATIONSHIPS

Trauma, in all its forms, can profoundly impact relationships. It can often leave individuals struggling to connect with their partners and build healthy, secure attachments. Traumatic experiences can alter the functioning of the nervous system and cause individuals to feel hypervigilant, reactive, and experience varying degrees of anxiousness and avoidance in the face of intimacy and connection. For those who have experienced complex trauma, such as C-PTSD, the impact on attachment can be even more profound. This can lead to difficulty trusting others and forming healthy relationships.

I understand and appreciate the unique challenges that trauma survivors face in their relationships. I work with my clients to create a shame-free, trauma-informed space, integrating somatic, behavioral, and relational strategies.

HOW TO BEGIN THERAPY FOR COUPLES

As a therapist, I do not tell my clients what is “normal” or “healthy.” Instead, I work with couples to map out differences, similarities, and strengths, identify effective communication methods, and create collaborative, re-authored agreements around boundaries, intimacy, emotional connection, and time. I aim to create a relaxed, relatable, and safe space for clients to discuss sensitive issues related to sex, relationships, and intimacy. I am committed to serving traditionally underserved communities through therapy, including people of color, sex workers, LGBTQIA+ individuals, and those with different ability levels. Additionally, I understand that everyone’s experiences and concerns are unique, and I approach every session with empathy, compassion, and respect. If you or your partner(s) are struggling, I am here to help. I offer a wide variety of services related to therapy for couples, blended families, and more.

TAKE THE FIRST STEP TOWARD HEALING

OTHER MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES OFFERED AT ANCHOR PSYCHOTHERAPY, INC.

In addition to couples therapy, I offer a wide range of mental health services designed to support you throughout your journey. These services include individual therapy for all ages, child and family therapy, trauma-informed therapy, EMDR and AF-EMDR, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and eating disorder treatment, . I also specialize in supporting individuals and families navigating high-conflict divorce, parental alienation, and complex family dynamics.